Mr. Fix-It

Ok … I don’t want this blog to become a relationship-laden website with stories and anecdotes of my failed attempts at love.  So this one isn’t exactly like that.  And the next one will be about TV.

It breaks my heart (yes, I do have one) when I see a friend in distress.  It could be about a relationship gone bad, a tragedy, or just them feeling sick.  I feel bad.  I guess that’s partly why I became a doctor – I don’t like seeing people upset.  And I hate seeing people cry.*

*I know sometimes I present a bravado about not caring, but realistically, I do care about people.  I’ve said before that I really want to believe that everyone is inherently a good person.  I’m just afraid that I’m right in believing that I’m wrongI do get upset when I see someone I care for is upset.  It makes me feel worse when I can’t do anything to fix it.

That’s the thing with me … I have this intense desire to fix everything.  I think that’s why sometimes I’m drawn to certain people.  If they have something that I can improve, I do my hardest to make it better.

The other night, I finally sent a text to a good friend of mine whom I’ve known for a good portion of my life.  She had made some subtle posts on a social networking site that had me a little concerned.  The reply was what I expected – relationship issues.  Isn’t that always the case with 90% of people.  Why do we let others cause us so much pain?

The most surprising thing about this ordeal is that my friend is beautiful.  I’m not talking the “beautiful” that you use to describe your friend because you don’t want to make her feel bad.  No, I’m talking BEAUTIFUL.  GORGEOUS.  MODEL-TYPE STUNNING.  This is a woman that I would bet 90% of all men would seriously consider changing their lives to meet her standards and just get to spend time with her.  This is a woman that is as close to perfect as a female can be.

So how on Earth can a guy not do whatever he has to do to keep her happy?  Because most of us guys are idiots.  Plain and simple.  I’m guilty of it as well, but I’m a different kind of idiot.  If a girl this beautiful was interested in me, I would do whatever I had to do to keep that happiness going.*

*My problem is that I jump into things with both feet and sometimes make the girl feel as though she can do just about anything and I wouldn’t care.  So because I don’t play the “hard to get” game, the girl loses interest in me.  I think this is happening again to me now, but I’m not 100% sure yet.

I felt bad that all I could do was offer support and a listening ear, which is what I offer to all my friends in duress.  I guess I’d be happier if some of them would actually call me and let me help them sometimes.  Helping people is what I tend to do best.  And I have been told that my advice is spot-on, especially when it comes to relationships – which makes sense since none of mine last.

You know what one of the worst parts about this situation is?  I will give the great advice, be the listening ear, show her that there are good guys out there, and the thought that maybe I should be the one she should want will never cross her mind.  And that’s ok with me; I’m not trying to be a friend so that it can blossom into something more.  I know some guys do that, but I have seen so many problems arise when that happens in a group of friends that it’s better if it never happens.  This is not a TV series or anything.  But it is a funny thing …

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